More Than A Chapter

Photo by Monsterloi on Pixabay After my younger son died, I started reading a lot about near-death experiences and spirituality, which led me down the path toward meditation. It has helped me immensely. Part of me is trying to find my son in the now--in those quiet spaces during meditation. And sometimes I do.  A book fell into my path called Mindfulness . It requires practicing (after all meditation is a practice) twice a day over the course of 8 weeks.  I love it and am wondering what will take its place once the 8 weeks are over. I look forward to the 20-minute, guided sessions twice a day. I wish I would have found time for this when my kiddo was alive. It would have made me appreciate the moments with him all that much more.  I have also been exercising. I have done this anyway, even when both boys were little. But because my resting heart rate was easily 115 for such a long time, I decided to increase the number of days I exercise, as well as doing more cardio (I mu...

I've been grappling with my surgery choices since the consult with the breast surgeon. Tentatively, I have a lumpectomy scheduled for September 25th. But there's an inner voice that's telling me I should have a double mastectomy instead. The surgeon's willing to perform this operation. Although, I can tell her preference is breast conservation surgery with radiation.  Here's the thing, this is my third go-around with breast cancer. Granted, the other two instances (in 2012 and 2016) were pre-cancers. However, there was malignancy present. And it was in the other breast. Having a lumpectomy with radiation for the new cancer only helps this breast. The opposite one receives no benefit from the radiation. I know I am going to fret about the potential return on the other side, especially right before my annual mammogram. My PCP thinks it's time for mastectomy. She said three instances of BC in 8 years is a lot.  I tend to think she's right. Because there's s...